Ancient Mesopotamians lived in families, each consisting of a father and a mother, commonly with a third child, and rarely with more than that. Family in Ancient Mesopotamia The ancient Mesopotamians had families that were nuclear, i.e. the father, mother, and also a third child, rarely more than that.
The civilization of the area that arose between the Tigris and Euphrates rivers was commonly referred to as the Cradle of Civilization and it provided the first cities, writing systems, and law codes to the world. However, under the pomp of ziggurats and the complexity of the imperial administration was the very smallest unit of Mesopotamian society, the family. The family as the Assyrians define it was a miniature of the state in the eyes of the Sumerians, Babylonians and Assyrians. The father was the ruler just like the king was the ruler of the city and the gods the rulers of the universe. This form was not a social choice but a legal and economic requirement aimed at providing survival in the severe environment.
The Patriarchal Authority
It is undeniable that Ancien Mesopotamia was a patriarchal society. The head of the family or the father was the absolute ruler of his wife, kids and any slaves present in his premises. His word was law and this was supported by the renowned Code of Hammurabi. In the worst case, when a father was heavily in debt, he had a legal right to sell his wife or children into bondage servants to work off creditors, although not more than three years. Although this is draconian to the modern ear, it was considered a last resort to maintain the long-term solvency of the family unit and not to disfigure it forever.
Although this is an absolute power, the father too had the weight of responsibility. He was criminally liable to the deceds of his household. In case a child did commit a crime, the father would be required to pay the fine. He was the point of contact between the family and the state, since he had to pay taxes, do corvée labor (physical work that was forced upon him by the state), and also represent the family in the community meetings. The patriarchal stability was what formed the stability of the city-state.
Marriage as a Legal Contract
Mesopotamians literature and poetry had romance, although marriage was mainly a commercial partnership between two families. It was a legal agreement which was meant to generate legitimate successors and establish economic or social associations. The procedure started with the engagement that was closed by the contract and feast. One of the major economic aspects of this union was wealth exchange. The bride price was paid by the family of the groom as a way of compensating the father of the bride as he would lose his work force. The father of the bride on the other hand gave the bride a dowry that included household items, furniture and occasionally land or slaves.
This dowry was important as technically in as much as it was under the control of the husband it was actually the property of the wife and children. It acted as a kind of insurance. In case of the husband died or divorced her without a valid reason, dowry was sent back to her maintenance. The common norm was that of monogamy but the man was allowed to marry the second or a concubine especially when the first wife was barren. Procreation of the family was of the utmost importance of any marriage and infertility was a tragedy that necessitated legal and social measures.
The Complex Status of Women
Although legally inferior to men, Mesopotamian women had their rights and freedoms which were usually superior to women in subsequent classical civilizations such as Greece or Rome. They were not rigidly locked down at home. It is documented that women were allowed to own property, sign contracts, appear in court as a witness, and run businesses. They had women working in the textile business, brewing beer, and running taverns. The high status women like the naditu priestesses of Babylon were economic giants and lent and invested in property during the period of their lives in semi-monastic societies.
The law however practiced a dualism when it comes to fidelity. Adultery by a woman was a capital crime, and could be punished by drowning, but a man was free to visit the prostitutes or even have intercourse with the enslaved women without any legal consequences as long as such a deed did not violate the rights of another free man. The main role of a wife was to take care of the household and children so that the domestic economy would be well managed as her husband took care of the farming or administrative tasks.
Childhood and Education
In Mesopotamia, children were treasured yet regarded as a retirement investment. The main reason of passing up a large family was to guarantee the number of hands to work the fields and most importantly to take care of the parents in their old age. There was a certain legal duty, which demanded that the children should give food, clothes, and respect to their old parents. When the parents had died, children had to conduct the funerary rites and offerings to the spirits of ancestors regularly. Any failure to do so was thought to cause haunting ghosts in the living.
There was a strong gendered and class-based education. To most of the mass of boys, education consisted in an apprenticeship with the father, in the art of farming, of building, or weaving. Girls remained with their mothers and were taught the intricate art of food preparation, spinning of wool and housekeeping. The sons of the elite and the rich used to receive formal education in the edubba, or tablet house. In this case they were subjected to extensive and usually severe training in order to become scribes and learn the thousands of cuneiform signs which were needed to operate the bureaucracy of the empire.
Adoption and Inheritance
Since the family was the economic unit, the crisis was a lack of heirs. Therefore, adoption was an acceptable and legal norm in Mesopotamia. It was also not limited to orphans, there were occasions that adults were adopted to serve an old couple as a reward to take over their inheritance. These adoption contracts were serious. In case an adopted child refused to acknowledge the parents in the future with such words as You are not my father or You are not my mother, the law imposed the cruel punishment which included removing the tongue or branding, a symbol of the violation of the contract between parents.
